I will be vindicated from any obligations soon.

immensely tired, drained and empty

It is very obvious there is something wrong, when you are questioning your decisions everyday.

Impulsive, rash, incapable and impatient.

That pretty much summarizes whatever is happening this episode.

I have been putting it off for too long already.

Maybe i lack the resolve. Maybe i'm hiding behind some perceived values.

i'm so tired. i'm so pissed. i'm so indignant.

my one last obligation.

my one last hurrah.

my one last effort.



I cried my fucking self to sleep.

First time in fucking 5 years.

I honestly can't believe it. But i've snapped.

When you keep pouring water into a cup, one day it will overflow.

to be honest, i couldn't give a flying fuck about anything much anymore.

People would never be cooperative.

People would never step out of their comfort zone.

People would never stick their head out for others.

Myself always comes before others.


Maybe I'm a fucking idiot.

I should have learnt that a long time ago.

Maybe I did. BUT I DIDN'T LIKE THE WAY PEOPLE BEHAVE.

I WANTED TO CHANGE THE PEOPLE AROUND ME.

I TRIED MY BEST.

I failed terribly.

I'm so lost again.

fuck.