The world is crying. The glint of sadness evident in everyone's eyes, the shadow of doubt residing in everyone's soul. Yet, some of us derive pleasure from other's sadness. Having a fucked up childhood, I bear witness and comprehend the linkage of the feeling of being ostracised by peers. Yet, now I merely look on, silent and unwilling to change anything, because I am unable to accept the person as who he is, as many before me had chosen not to. Although not the initiator, nor am I a executor, my sheer presence and awareness of what is happening, puts me in a similar position. I can feel the suffering spreading like wildfire, with more and more people getting entangled in a web of sadness. The dying of resilent hearts, the failure of relationships, the backstabbing of close friends. The failure of meeting up to various expectations. People are twisted.
Personally, i am still experiencing negative feelings towards me now. I don't really like how it is, but I am too shy to stand up for myself in people relations. I become perceived as withdrawn, cold, unfriendly, slack and unable to do much in constructive assignments. But what many are unaware of, is my thinking goes beyond their comprehension. the expansiveness of my thoughts, brushes on the edges of the abyssal darkness, and the illuminating saint. I am aware of many more things than people want me to know, i can bore into one's soul and know what his next move is, i know many things.
Vice
Hatred
Agony
Pain
Despair
Distraught
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Thursday, July 17, 2008
17 July is finally here.
POLITE 1st game vs RP, got creamed real bad. scoreline was like 25-5 or something like that.
Forwards was better, but things just didnt work out.. zzzz
i dun really celebrate birthdays, but ya this is kinda lame.
at least my friends came down to TP and stayed with me till the end, kinda nice of them too, given my bag weighed a ton, and they helped me lug it around.
my shoulders are even more busted than yesterday, after carrying both side injuries, i still started and played the whole duration of the match.. Ouch.
nice KFC dinner.. =D
nice durians.. =D
at least im contented on my birthday. so many people wished me happy bday, and for that i thank them =). thank you very much =D
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Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Zz 11:43 on wednesday morning. School's at 1. and i havent even changed yet. so bored at home. zzz
feel my medal prospects at this year wcg is not really high, given people are mass practising, and i just realised that my mouse feels weird... as though its not seasoned, even though i've been using it for like 2 years plus. not a good sign.
i'm so darned rusty. =| gah. if i get in 100 games before wcg, maybe ill be prepared. about 90 more to go. but with so much committments, i begin to doubt the realism of it.. grr. see howww.. =|
!!!!!!
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Sunday, July 13, 2008
11 PM on a sunday evening.
47 hours into the weekend, and a pretty uneventful one at that too, and i have done nearly nothing constructive.
spent 30 minutes on my INFA tutorial the entire weekend.
so where did my other 46 hours 30 minutes go?
granted 16 for sleeping,
30 hours 30 minutes..
I suck at making good use of my time
zzzz
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Friday, July 11, 2008
July and August. What a happening month for me.
11 July 2008, which happens to be today, my brother just went into army. and the BMTC @ tekong, looks like a bloody chalet. and based from what those stupid COs are spamming, the tekanning sessions, are very much toned down. boring~! imma go commando, or just get my ass to be a clerk.. =|
12 July 2008, one of my dear gaming friends is going aussie to study! Though the word "miss" may be a little inappropiate, since i hardly have much contact online, much less offline with her recently, i will still use it all the same! i will miss you! good luck and have fun in Australia! kangaroooosssssss
17 July 2008, NP vs RP rugby season game 1. got a good vibe going into this game, after nearly beating ACS(I) today, losing by only 1 try margin, and we should have won anyway.
21 July 2008, NP vs TP rugby season game 2.
28 July 2008, NP vs ITE rugby season game 3.
31 July 2008, NP vs SP rugby season game 4.
7-8 August 2008, WCG SG.
11 August - 22 August 200, Final semester exams.
Not to mention countless project deadlines... class tests... tutorials... assholes...
asdfghjkl
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Thursday, July 03, 2008
Results of my common test
ITB - 86/100 A+
INFA - 61/80 B+
BSTATS - 36/50 B
BCOMM - 14/20 B
MICEC - 41/50 A
Some screwed up results.. zzz..
it is incredibly engimatic for me, to expect better grades than those for a crap amount of effort.
Oh well... =|
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