"What a week phew~!"

seriously, what a week. this week we had 5 hours of free periods. that is like 1/6 of school time slacking >_<. this week, i was totally unprepared for school, following the holidays where i spent every day either playing or training for my tournament. mentally prepared? nahhh.. i was lethargic, weary, pissed. u name the emotion, i displayed it. this week was emotionally very taxing for me. too much stress from family,friends,peers,studies,games, nearly gave me one of my very rare emotional breakdowns. i am pretty well known for holding stress well, but this week, i was this close to not be able to take it any further. not much help from family and friends huh? but im a introvert so dont worry i will get by well enough =). singers, sing, songs. if not for the presence of songs this whole week, i probably would have broke down. songs were ringing through my head as i struggled to hold back a punch for a well-deserved annoying guy. songs rang through my head as i held back my vast arsenal of verbal insults at a particularly act-cute person. songs songs songs. there is this song, that i find very inspiring and motivating, and would like to share with all readers of my blog. i couldnt post it on my previous blog as it was too messy and it will totally complicate everything there...

S.H.E - 星星之火

女孩 越过小路爬上了山丘
那时的她 还不懂为什么
萤火虫都不动 停驻在夜空
点亮了小小宇宙

女孩 慢慢长大却还是懵懂
那时的她 还不懂为什么
大人们能抽空 为失恋喝杯酒
却没空看看星空

“不要 不要 忘了做过的梦”
天上星星 仿佛听她述说 兴奋地闪烁

我要变成那一颗星星 整夜都亮晶晶
不怕阴暗的黑影 骄傲地闪不停
SHINING (SHINING) 亮丽到月儿都妒忌
灿烂的一颗星星 一生也亮晶晶
因为夜归的背影 有了我的指引
SHINING (SHINING) 勇气就在你手心

this song is about a little girl as she grows up, learns the realities of life. she still does not understand why do grown ups like to take time off to drown their sorrows in liqour rather than finding time to find a better solution to the problem rather than trying to keep it as far back in the mind as possible. the line. “?? ?? ??????”has a great significant meaning to me. 30th august, 2005. on my first official tournament, when i was totally raw to the warcraft community. for those who was present at NYP then, i was the orc that towered everyone. i won the inter-school warcraft compy on my first attempt. since then, i've been harbouring dreams of becoming one of the top3 players in WCG singapore. everyone i knew. told me that it was impossible. all discouraging me, telling me to spend my time elsewhere, more productive. most sneer at the fact i train so much wc, with possibly no hope of realising my dreams. when i was at my lowest, tired out from all criticsm, this song, this line was what kept me going. every time i listen to this song, i get a renewed motivation, a renewed incentive. to continue training. it tells us to strive to become a star that shines brightly. not afraid of the odds, fear, negativity, continue with what we believe is right, until we can change the people around us from thinking it is a waste of time, to jealously. the song also tells us to be a star that always shine brightly, because we have the power to control negativity in our lives. i lost all competitiveness already. i cant do what i used to love doing, mass wc. lastly, it emphasises on courage. courage to deal with failure, courage to press on with what we are doing, courage to win, courage to try. courage comes from within. it can never be bought,sold,traded,made. one of the more inspiring chinese songs..~~ Link -- http://www.yousendit.com/transfer.php?action=download&ufid=767A4509711AD423